No, I am not getting married! But I have decided that I will begin to tackle the task of learning to enjoy some of the things that I had written off as "not fun". Fine... they're called fears. So the first one will be... rollerblading! Don't laugh now! I'm serious! Next on the list is riding a horse. It's not that I can't do it, just, you know... losing the fear so I can actually enjoy it. I know this wonderful girl who is master of the blades and after watching her I had resigned myself to being eternally inferior since I had long ago thrown the towel in when it came to placing my feet on wheels since it seemed the only cool tricks I could do involved helplessly careening full speed down hills and then they all seemed to share the same abrupt ending... me plastered agains stone walls, phone booths and light poles. But no more! "Brother bullet" has taken a leave of absence for a month to France with his family and has rendered me the honor of entrusting me his highly treasured racing rollerblades. In return of this kind gesture I have vowed to at least gear up a couple of times while he's gone ( knee pads, gloves and all) and hopefully after falling enough times either finally catch on or at least lose the fear. Wish me luck!
While speaking with a friend yesterday I came to the conclusion that my concept or thoughts by which to define or interepret a marriage may be far from what they should. Soooooo... I have a simple question for my blog today. For those of you who are married this may be easier, and for those of you fellow pisceans, perhaps not as much. However, I am very interested in learning how you perceive it so a little help please...?
" And now abides faith, hope, love; these three but the greatest of these is love."
Something has happened of late that is almost beyond words. It is the answer to my prayers, the fulfillment of a wish that I had only had the faith to dream of. A hope that went far beyond anything I myself could have ever brought about has come to life, and lastly, a manifestation of love that has reached beyond limitations has bridged the hearts of many.
Those of you how know me well enough are aware of the fact that for over 20 years my mother has been single. Her love has upheld us, her children, through many difficult situations. Over the years she has endured numerous hardships and adverse circumstances out of that love for us. The last seven years of her life have not been easy with the birth of my youngest brother Angel and the change in her lifestyle that it brought about. Taking care of little Angel is by no means an easy job, two days with the little man exhaust even me, yet she goes on day after day caring for, looking after and giving love to that special child. The task is quite demanding physically and emotionally for a small woman in her late forties. It was hard for me to move away and trust that she would be o.k. on her own.
However, a couple of days ago I received a letter that made me the happiest I have been in a very long time, so much so that it brought tears to my eyes. It left me with nothing else but a feeling of peace and gratitude, thankfulness to God for bringing someone with as tender and sincere a heart as into the life of my mother.
It came from a wonderful man who through his example of love, selflessness and commitment has reminded meof just thow much I have to learn and renewed the desire in me to be a better man.
I have welcomed him with open arms in to my family and feel privileged to have someone as remarkable as he share his life with my mother.
It amazes me how God has brought the lives of these two wonderful people together… they have many things in common, they’ve both had their share of life experience and in spite of some of its blows have managed to retain that sense of what true love really is…that of giving without expecting anything in return, truly seeking the happiness of others above their own and finding joy in doing so. Letting go of those they held dear and yet having the courage, strength and faith to overcome the fear and love once again.
I love you both and hold you close to my heart.
Felicidades! None are more deserving to be happy!
The gift God chose to give my mother on this special day (we celebrate Mother’s day on the 10th here) was my life. I don’t think I can fully express how I feel at the moment, somewhere between in a daze and at the same time never more alive. Today sometime between 12 and 1 pm. I came face to face with death in the form of a speeding semi-truck.
I was at the abastos pulling a “diablito” along going down a a street flanked with parked trucks when I heard a speeding truck approaching, upon looking up I realized that I had no time or space to dive in between the trucks, all I could do was move over as far as possible and pray he would stop. Next thing I knew, the truck caught my diablito and wrenched it from my hands (the metal handles sliced me) pulling it back and to the left, the right handle dug into my back and pushed me into the truck. I still can explain how I wasn’t pulled beneath the tires to share the fate of the crushed diablito as the force of the impact spun me to my left and sent me flying… it’s as if something held me back just long enough for the truck to speed by, it was so close that it knocked off the cap I was wearing. I was literally inches from my grave.
It’s true, time slows down and your life does flash before you. Oddly enough all I could think about was how I hadn’t called my Mom that morning (I left home early) and that I didn’t want to go without her knowing just how much she meant to me. I was finally able to get through tonight. I was never more happy to hear her voice. I cried.
Even now I don’t think it has fully set in how inexplicable it is that I am here. It scares me to think of just how different my world and that of my loved ones could be had things been different… I don’t understand why but I am thankful. I just want to take a moment to say that… those of you who matter. I love you. You mean more to me than you think. I don’t take you for granted and thank you for your prayers, I know they are the reason I am still here.
At moments like these your perspective is aligned, your focus is clear and you are able to see like never before what it is that truly matters.
If there is a moral to this story it would have to be; life is fragile, cherish the time you have and use it to tell those you hold dear how much you love them, take nothing for granted and lastly forget your pride and stupid reasons for putting off until tomorrow what you may regret having not said or done.
I miss you all.
You know what? I have realized that I have a tendency to get carried away in drama so today I want to tell you about something on a different subject matter altogether…
…the unique children I have the pleasure to live with and occasionally look after. Allow me to introduce to you this outstanding brood; there is Samuel, (The 7 year old intellectual, rational philosopher) Isaac, (the 4 year old cynic, with a mind so far beyond his years and the lack of better judgment to carry out his senseless schemes that it’s sometimes scary) Angelito, ( The terrible two’s insomniac chunky drooler who insists on speaking in Spanish and giving me head butts 24/7) and little Sebastian (he is only 2 months old, yet even now I wonder what his contribution will be to this motley crew).
We have wonderful times together and have grown close over the last year. It amazes me just how capable children are of being absolute individuals and just basically “little big people”, giants of intellect trapped in tiny bodies.
So the other day upon arriving at the park for our daily episode of knightly adventures and fabulas de extraterrestres, our eyes fell upon the picture of a poor Pug puppy; it was a sign for a lost dog written in first person form. “ Hi, my name is Goliath (the irony in a name like that) and I miss my home. I like to do such and such and eat this and that etc… etc.”
After having read it I noticed the two older boys brooding and lost in deep thought, until Isaac breaks the silence expressing in his most serious and pensive tone… “ I don’t think it’s true… cause, if he was smart enough to write this, how would he have gotten lost?” to which the philosopher immediately pipes up in his “eureka” tone , “NO! You see he really IS intelligent, or else he wouldn’t have gotten away! He escaped from his owners and doesn’t want to go back or be found. So, the owners have to make it SOUND like he wants to go back so that if somebody actually finds him they will MAKE him go back!”.. I’m still standing there hoping that one of then will just say “poor puppy” but no, Isaac takes on that far away look again and comes back with, “ Yes , they probably beat him… I think they had him tied up and…. “ this is where I pull them both along and try to divert their attention from expounding in graphic detail their proposed tale of this poor dogs woes with something as frivolous as “Oh look at that bird!” Dios mio. The mind of a child.
Turns out it was the wrong thing to distract them with as upon closer inspection the bird only had one wing and that set off an entire new episode of “deep thoughts”. But that is a whole different story that I will save for another day.
All that to say, there is never a dull moment with this bunch and I love the fact that they never cease to surprise me with the inner thought of their psyche. It’s true, you really do learn a lot from children, although, that whole episode might have gone over my head.
I trust you all had a wonderful Children's Day. I did! Was on TV and the hostess was hitting on me! The really good part though was whent I got to dres her up like a lady bug! Oh yeah... she was into it... crazy chick.
Highlight of this week was camping out on the lawn of a friend's new house... feels good to be out of the "city" and be woken up by birds at 6 am.
Since my hair is growing out I decided to comb it today and look like a mini microphone.. hooray! It's all nice and poofy, or is it puffy? I always get confused.. Isn't "puffy" for things like cotton and clouds and" poofy" for occassionally smelly things and hairy mammoths like Manny? If so... I am talking about poofy like Manny minus the smell. I am beginning to once again give credit to my childhood nickname "scrubby", hey at least I helped Angelito learn a new word "pelo". He comes up every 5 minutes and wants to touch it. hehe
My dear sister Suko turned 22 Saturday... Felicidades! I feel old now.
I forgot Luci's B-day. (florecita rokera) I tihnk she didn't want me to know about it.. she is into being the quiet observer you know the ever present but unnoticed type.. hehe .. yeah right.
What I am trying to say is .. I'M SORRY LAURA! I am sure you had a great time and I will try to remember next time, that is of course if you let me know.
I am seriosuly thinking of putting myself up for adoption. All applicants please be aware that occassional cuddling is a must... I know, I know... I'm helpless.
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