Feliz Navidad everyone.

New Year --- here we come.


May 5th, 2005

Thank you for you love compadre, it has been a while I know. Listen Jesus, I wanted to talk a little bit about what happened yesterday and try to speak my heart. You know how I was hoping to run into her online? You know how much I think about her and especially how this last week she has been in my thoughts. The thing is that once I did, I wasn't sure what to say and apparently I hardly ever say the appropriate thing. I want so badly to reach out to her, to say something that will encourage her, but it seems I get absorbed into this attitude of wanting to hear her say something definite now, I let my feelings overcome me and end up saying the first thing that comes to mind without praying or even stopping to fully consider her current circumstance.
It is almost like I carry an attitude of needing to hear her say something that will give me hope. I know this is wrong and I need Your help to change this. I know that it really is not that hard to trust You about her, to have faith and not worry that You are in control and are there with her and are no doubt being faithful to speak to her heart. I know it is senseless to worry or think that there is something that I can do to make it easier or whatever ... it is easy to see this once I am calm and composed.
You know that this whole situation has been hard for me; I know that this has been hard for her too, perhaps not so much in letting things go, as in my case, but rather in embracing the future, she is full of uncertainty and has questions in her mind that she has difficulty formulating. I am having a hard time embracing the future as well; my questions may be different in that I do not understand why.
The good thing was that she sounded happy ... she seems to have a gift for staying positive about things, many a times she helped to pull me out of slumps and was more of an encouragement than she will ever know. I know our relationship was far from perfect, many doomed it to defeat from day one, but I know that you allowed us to be together to help us stretch our faith, to help us open our eyes and for me, to make me vulnerable in order to learn what love really is. I have come to see this separation as a blessing, a difficult blessing but nonetheless one that has allowed me to rise above and come out of the selfish little world I lived in.
To be honest I feel like I am failing a little bit more everyday in what it is You are asking of me. You know all of my thoughts but it seems to help me when I get it all out. Thank you for listening. Jesus, please ease this pain, please remove my feelings, I cannot carry this anymore, I know I've never had to and I have brought this on myself but I cannot help having those moments when I feel like my heart is constantly screaming in silence and my thoughts are confined to worry, uncertainty and sadness.
My life has been so blessed, so full of love, I have no room to complain, your love has overwhelmed me ... I am not asking you to help me feel as if I will never need anyone or anything again either; I know that as long as I have you I will be fine, but I am asking you to please rewire me, do away with me presets, my desires and anything that may not be in line with what is Your will for me.
I love her Lord, she is like a permanent water mark that appears to be invisible, unnoticed to the eye, seeming to be erased until that moment when my heart is squeezed the tears flow and the truth could never be more obvious. If it is your will for that mark to remain as a constant reminder, then please give me your supernatural love so I can wear the scar boldly ... and then let me forget about myself and turn to the needs of others. Take away my selfishness in wanting to hold onto this and make me the blessing that I need to be.
Please also do look after her heart. Keep it in your care, give her the desires of her heart and help her to find the peace and happiness she seeks. Give her faith to hear Your voice and to set aside her own thoughts, fears concerns and worries. Help her to be faithful to call out to You and in those moments she feels her faith wavering to seek Your word.
I will not be redundant, thanks for understanding. If you have anything to say, you know how much I treasure your advice, counsel and encouragement ... I am listening.


The human heart is a beautiful thing. It is the place within your temple where the physical and spiritual meet. It is your sanctuary. I designed it so that it could be filled with My love. Nothing else can fill that space. You know how it is said that there is a constant struggle between your heart and mind? Well rest assured I hold the key to your heart, once you have asked Me to come in I never leave you.

Sometimes it seems like you are alone, when you allow the cares of this life, its worries its fears, uncertainties and seemingly paramount concerns cloud your perception, when you lose sight of why it is you have been given the greatest gift of all; the opportunity to live a life of love. You know, it seems unnatural to be genuinely unselfish, to prefer others needs, the happiness and love of others to your own hurt, it is not easy. Your flesh longs to make its self happy, to soak up all the beauty this world has to offer. This in its self is not wrong. I want you to be happy, but there comes a time when you have seen the needs of others and when I ask you to take the love you have for Me a step further and allow Me to use you, allow Me to make you more than just a recipient of my love.

It is more blessed to give than to receive. Because as you know, all the beauty of this life, all the joy it has to offer, the love you now in this physical realm will never be enough. These are the moments that count, this is when that struggle is takes on a vivid form and you are faced with decisions that fulfill your destiny.

You have to choose to answer the call. Remember that I love you, just you --you stand before me alone and I know you like no other. The ones you hold dear, they stand alone before Me as well, they belong to Me, I will not let them go either --- you have to trust Me on this. The greatest manifestation of your love for them is recognizing that your love will never be enough and doing what you can to help them come to know Me intimately.
Let go --- do not hold back --- empty yourself ---

Be happy! Cut the drama! Forget about you and think about others.

Pray, yes, but then act as if I have already taken care of it, because I have! Smile! Laugh! Look ahead and do not live in shadows of fear.

You will be alright. I promise that you will look back and see that the heartache is a small price to pay for the happiness to be found in trusting Me and finding the peace you long for.
Now give Me a hug and let our tears of joy wipe away the fear and frustration. Remember that the here and now is not forever and beyond, but deeds of love and kindness, those live on forever.

dale dale dale...  

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Although the origins of the Piñata are debatable with some believing it to have derived from either ancient African, Chinese or Aztec culture, the piñata as we currently know it in Mexico is a tradition largely influenced by the Spanish and hereby Catholic culture. You see the seven spikes represent the 7 cardinal sins and the blindfolded individual the poor lost man blinded by sin or faith (which must be blind) and the bounty within it (fruit, candy) the mercy of God or his gifts. It plays an important role in the typical Mexican festivity *posada* where its breaking represents the moment that God manifested his love and mercy to mankindthrough salvation in the birth of his son Jesus.

It also makes for a lot of fun. Heh…

So I got one last week and I have begun to put my personal goodies I there I plan to break it on New Year, there are already an assortment of goodies in there such as tamarindo candy, chocolates, Trojans, peanuts some coins and other odd items … something tells me the guys are gonna enjoy this piñata. I am thinking of having anyone who wants to take a swing at it toss 10 pesos (about a dollar) in first, the guy who busts it takes all the coins...

In any case, it hangs from the rustic beam on my cabin/ bedroom roof and brightens the room nicely. Think Festive.

Feliz Navidad!

one more time around  

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Have you ever found yourself thinking... Why?

Not who or when or how ... just why.

Why do we need people back?

Is there an answer to why?

Do you wonder why you wait?

Why you hope you dream of it?

Why it will not go away?

Why it hides deep down?

No matter what the cause for waiting, the imagination that formed and brought the dreams you have will also cause them to disappear ... or will it? This also is driving me up the wall.

I don't know why ... but I believe in feeling and what it means to believe.

So, one more time around ...

Are you waiting?


Maybe...?

Who cares?  

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Are Americans charitable? Or chintzy?
By Clara Jeffery, Mother Jones

2 IN 3 American households say they give to charity, at an average of $1,262 a year. But only 1 in 3 households report charitable deductions to the IRS.

ON AVERAGE, Americans think that 24% of the federal budget goes toward foreign aid. Only 0.9% actually does.

FOUR YEARS after Bush founded the Millennium Challenge Corporation to reward Africa's best-run countries and pledged to fund it by $5 billion a year, the MCC has disbursed only 1% of that amount.

ASKED ABOUT doubling African aid, Bush said, "It doesn't fit our budgetary process."

ASKED HOW they would change President Bush's budget, Republicans would reduce foreign aid by an average of $2.6 billion. Democrats would increase it by $7.7 billion.

BECAUSE AID agencies are forced to buy from U.S. companies at inflated prices, historically America has effectively taken back 70% of the aid it donated.

LAST FALL, the U.N. requested aid for Niger and got almost no response. At that time, $1 per day per person would have solved Niger's food crisis. Now $80 is needed.

THE AVERAGE American family throws away 14% of its food. 1 in 9 families are never sure they'll have enough to eat.

A TYPICAL AMERICAN child receives 70 new toys a year, most of them at Christmas.

8 IN 10 DOG OWNERS buy their pet holiday gifts. 6 in 10 cat owners do.

AMERICANS SPEND $8 billion on Christmas decorations, almost 4 times what they give to protect animals and the environment.

praying for you Kika  

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Hi everyone,
I'd like to ask for your support in prayer for Kika my 4 year-old
sister. She's been sick with high fevers and headaches the past few
weeks. We've been doing tests and taking her to get checked and now
finally we know what the problem is. She has an infection in her brain
fluid (which runs through her shunt). So she will be hospitalized
while they perform a three week operation. Please pray for her healing
and quick recovery, that everything will go as planned and she'll be
home soon and in time for Christmas.
Thank you so much, I love you. Cheri

(update)
So the second operation(taking out the blood clot) went well.
Although there is still a chance of it clotting again. This morning
she has a fever. Please continue praying for her health and strength.
I love you all. bye


This little girl is an Angel. The first time I met her I happened to be wearing my rasta beany. She loved it. Next time I visited I asked her if she remembered me.

-Kika it's me, Mig!-

to which she replied,

-No you're not. Where's your hat?-

I think of her every time I wear that hat.

I just want her family to know that she has been on my mind from the moment I heard and I will continue to uphold her in my prayers. As King David of old said; -God forbid that I should since against thee by ceasing to pray for thee-.

I see prayer as one of the greatest manifestations of love there is, to stop and take a moment to acknowledge the needs of others and intercede on their behalf---

Love you Kika--- hang in there.

Litlle Kika in the hospital

hasta luego  

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To those of you who are kind enough to grace me with your company on a messenger service from time to time... I will miss you.

As most of you know you will not find me there... I would however love to hear from you.

For me the one sad thing about chatting is that it seems to have in some part done away with good old fashioned letter writing, you know the kind where people actually took the time to think about what they wanted to say as opposed to shooting off the first thing that came to mind.

I know, guilty as charged. Hey, at least I admit it.

So... if you feel the urge to write me, don't fight it... you'll most likely make my day.

Un abrazo

Enamorado  

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no more wine for those guys...  

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Los tres amigos  

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What?!? Who wouldn't be smiling?  

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the call  

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"Mig... you have a call."

*************************

Hello?

- When are you coming home?

It was nice to see you today little man!

- You can stay in our room...

I will try to visit soon, send my love to mom and the little man ok?

- Can I call sometimes just to say good night?...

Claro que si.

***********************

Feels good to be loved.

For love is sufficient unto love  

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Comforting to know I'm not the only one that's crazy... this guy was too.

*****************************************

Then said Almitra, "Speak to us of Love."

And he raised his head and looked upon the people, and there fell a stillness upon them.

And with a great voice he said:

When love beckons to you follow him,

Though his ways are hard and steep.

And when his wings enfold you yield to him,

Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.

And when he speaks to you believe in him,

Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.

Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,

So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.

He threshes you to make you naked.

He sifts you to free you from your husks.

He grinds you to whiteness.

He kneads you until you are pliant;

And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,

Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,

Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.

Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.

Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;

For love is sufficient unto love.

When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, I am in the heart of God."

And think not you can direct the course of love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.

Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself.

But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:

To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.

To know the pain of too much tenderness.

To be wounded by your own understanding of love;

And to bleed willingly and joyfully.

To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;

To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;

To return home at eventide with gratitude;

And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.

--The Prophet, Love --

Gibran Khalil Gibran (1883-1931)

think about it  

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wayak  

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Yesterday's post title: " to sleep with open eyes/eyes wide open".


Some days, weeks, sometimes even months can feel that way. It happened to me not too long ago. Some people never do figure out when they're awake, they never think they will be able to... others live dreaming of the day they will awaken while others still don't believe in dreams altogether.

Which are you?

Are you dreaming or sleeping awake?

and then there are...

Keej wenel  

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The Mayan language has once again gripped me, would you believe that I even attempetd to learn it at some point? In any case, I've had the dictionaries for quite some time now and have recently decided to give them a look ... fascinating language.

For those of you who may not know... "beuribe" means "moonshine" or the "moon's glow" in Mayan... that one stuck with me years ago... but you will discover that I am beginning to incorporate a lot more of the Mayan culture's phrases and thoughts in my every day language...

For example; I have decided that I will no longer simply say "I love you" to those I care for, not that the phrase "I love you" is in itself incomplete or inadequate... but perhaps I am just tired of feeling frustrated that people I express this to don't seem to understand what I am trying to convey and often opt for interpreting those beautiful three words as whatever current cliche or predetermined ideology comes to mind or suits their fancy .

I will now say to you special people; inlakesh.

I will have to explain what that means some other time but all that to say that
if you see odd words in here from time to time, fear not, I haven't gone crazy...


Táak in wenel-- (I'm sleepy)

"HE FEELS IT TOO"...  

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My feelings today.

The Ladies Man  

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of driving and dancing...  

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So it’s been a while… that is has. I have good news! God loves me enough to watch my back and give me a nudge when I’m falling asleep at the wheel. Good thing I don’t wear shades, not like He wouldn’t know whether I’m cruising with my eyes shut… but it feels good to take the wheel once again and be fully awake. There’s no hiding anything from Him. A real bud.

This last month has been one of those that you find yourself taking a pause and asking yourself, “what’s my age again?” It feels good to be young...

On other news I am dancing again… again… I realize I have determined to several times this year… but being that I may have a little more time on my hands from here to April I plan to make good use of it… Dancing apart from being away of life… allowing myself to for a moment lay all metaphors aside... is the single most physically pleasurable form of relieving stress and working up a sweat that could ever rival that three letter word. Good times. But it is also a form of expression, a language if you may that it isn’t bound by geographical distances… you can get on the dance floor with someone, not speak a word of their language and yet simply connect. It’s all about the connection. Write that one down.

So last night I got to jump in and do a 2 minute Latin routine for a bi-annual dance academy presentation, we were invited to do the Irish thing which sadly I have not done well with, but Suko… well she seems to have a knack for it and actually did not only the Latin number but participated in the Irish presentation as well, so talented. It was fun.

There were some ladies doing flamenco. HOT! Intense…

Hope to perform again soon , had forgotten just how fun it can be… of course it helps when I take off my glasses and can’t see a thing... I just smile and become oblivious to the audience response… kidding, the spotlights usually take care of that.

Will post some pics soon.

BLAST 2005  

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So there you have it, a few pictures. There were many many more, but I just don't think I could ever put up enough to adequately portray what a good time they had. I must admit, I was stressed most of the time and will never again take on that much work alone ... but in retrospect, it was definitely worth the effort.

Love all of you peeps!

Coming soon "...The Cervantino Experience..."

compadres **BLAST 2005**  

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awards **BLAST 2005**  

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I AM SO PROUD OF MY SISTERS!!



class time **BLAST 2005**  

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talented family **BLAST 2005**  

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leave my hair alone... **BLAST 2005**  

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how did they get in here?? **BLAST 2005**  

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love that smile... **BLAST 2005**  

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staying alive... **BLAST 2005**  

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drama club **BLAST 2005**  

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don't ask... **BLAST 2005**  

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these guys rocked... **BLAST 2005**  

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Gio looks happy... **BLAST 2005**  

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beautiful cousins **BLAST 2005**  

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shall we dance? **BLAST 2005**  

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dirty dancing **BLAST 2005**  

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"let me catch my breath... **BLAST 2005**  

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salsa crew **BLAST 2005**  

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rock out miguel... **BLAST 2005**  

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motley crew **BLAST 2005**  

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de todo un poco... **BLAST 2005**  

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happy boy... **BLAST 2005**  

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"at ease"... **BLAST 2005**  

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feel the music... **BLAST 2005**  

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lobby**BLAST 2005**  

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surfing **BLAST 2005**  

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old friends... **BLAST 2005**  

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new chicks on the block **BLAST 2005**  

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Noted...  

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Need to post pics.. have lots... will do soon.

 

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A little pic I fell in love with and just had to post while in my interim blogging stage...

look at that tounge.

It is official.. she is the cutest.

Heh..

Love you Laura.

Absentee  

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Oct. 2-7 BLAST 2005 (too much work, but the name says it all) - Oct: 7-8 CERVANTINO (I will see Luci!) - Oct: 9 CUERNAVACA (a breather with Simona AND Niky... that oughta be good, happy thoughts) - Oct:10-14 HOME ( miss my room) Oct: 15-18 MTY. for M* WEDDING ( saved the best for last)


Who has time for blogging these days???

Get off your chairs and go do something!

Un abrazo...

lived on September 25th  

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Airport… arrival * introduction * impression * reservation * rejection * connection * separation * desperation * reunion…

Came together … stepped out * family* hesitation* resistance * frustration* tears * hurt * struggle* fear * relief * share * laugh * trust * confide * acceptance * letting her in…

Going away… realize * care * distance * sacrifice* communicate * mistake * hurt* change * challenge * difficult * friends * new * bond * smile * honesty * reflection * blur…

…*Wonderful*…

…*Mistakes*…

Changed… emotion * distortion* attempt * adjust* question * assertion * departure * confusion* a distance is born…

Selfless … good intention * intercession * family * mother * pretence * meet another * love * denial * acceptance * affirmation * excitement * confide * dream * decide…

Everything changes… absence * ascertain * heartbreak * acceptance* letting her go …

Reminiscence… recollection… memories… best of wishes

Have a good time at the parade.

 

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There is the little man himself and a couple of weirdos.

The little man had to go in early for his yearly medicals, I am happy to say that he is doing well. We had such a good time, went to the zocalo; found a cool hippy/artesanias market and ( you can get genuine oober cool Guatemalan shirts for 5 dollars!) had a major "alambre" (look it up).



It's always a treat wen I see my fam, missed Esther and Angie thistime but we might catch them at Christina's wedding next month.... (she better let me plan the after party)

Monterrey here I come... consider yourself warned.

I love my family.

Story from the brain  

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‘Alright Jo, we’ve got 10 minutes before bed time… do you want me to read you a story?

“NO! I want a story from the brain!”

‘A story from the brain?! Oh! You want me to TELL you a story… right.’

“About a talking banana!”

‘A talking banana?!’

“Yeah! A bright blue one! And it’s named Sam!”

‘Oooooooook….. So, there was once this banana….’


Stuck in my head, I even dreamt about this Sam banana character last night…

Oh for the days when kids settled for Hans Christian Andersen…

I blame Dr. Seuss.

Where's my copy of green eggs and ham?

misfits  

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We're so butt ugly...

Thank God for charm.

The space between  

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Talk about parallel existence…

Today while reading the thots of a beautiful mind I caught a glimpse of the sanctuary where the heart and mind meet. It is in this place that these two giants of our soul are at peace and lay aside their differences… it’s where fantasy, like a ghost into the fog, blends into reality, where there are no boundaries to feeling, nor limitations to our thoughts or fear of the unknown. Within the fraction of a moment we remember...resent... accuse... condemn... forgive... forget and dare to dream once more.

The space between...

IS THIS TRUE??  

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FREAKY WEIRDO'S... HAS A SINGULAR RING TO IT. HEH
WHAT DO YOU THINK FOLKS? DID THIS ONE GET IT RIGHT?

(Emrys): I’m the one that listens
(Emrys): I told you before, I’m the middle man…I am there when people need the shoulder to cry on
(Joaquin): you forget I am a Pisces dear
(Emrys): yet I manage to make some room for myself
(Joaquin): the master of middle man
(Joaquin): you have no idea
(Emrys):): lol
(Joaquin): do you know any Pisces men?
(Emrys): yes I do
(Emrys): I know many pieces men
(Joaquin): you do?? No way!
(Joaquin):): ok...
(Joaquin): the scam is up, no more holding out on me
(Emrys): lol
(Emrys): yeah you guys are freaky weirdos
(Emrys): but I like you never the less
(Joaquin): freaky weirdos?!
(Joaquin): I am so blogging about this one!
(Joaquin): ok, out with it! Let’s hear your thoughts on Pisces men
(Emrys): hahaha
(Emrys): you have a way of being so passive
(Emrys): but then...some things
(Emrys): become so intense
(Emrys): I am!
(Emrys): hmm
(Emrys): but you know
(Joaquin): no
(Joaquin): I don't
(Joaquin): tell me more
(Emrys): okay
(Emrys): well
(Emrys): you guys are always quite intellectual
(Emrys): yet you have this strange...almost weird side to you
(Emrys): that makes you say when you’ve gone for that second drink
(Emrys):): “yup”
(Emrys): “he’s a Pisces”
(Joaquin): lol
(Joaquin): loving it
(Emrys): and they always have very interesting laughter
(Emrys): like a giggle
(Emrys): between a snort
(Emrys): hmm
(Emrys):): they pick up something they love to do
(Emrys): say a guitar
(Emrys): or a good whiskey
(Emrys): and just get lost in it
(Joaquin): I wonder what I’m lost in?
(Emrys): or they become one with the moment
(Joaquin): are women an option?
(Emrys): yes of course
(Joaquin): ok and then what happens?
(Emrys): you get all spacy
(Emrys): lose track of time
(Emrys): sometimes the fact that you're a fish makes so much sense
(Emrys): like a gold fish in the bowl
(Emrys): staring at you but not even realising what he’s looking at
(Emrys): heavy
Joaquin wow
(Emrys): I know stupid
(Emrys): I’m serious
(Emrys): you get them on ONE subject that they love
(Emrys): anything
(Emrys): and without realizing it,  they will go on about it for hours
(Joaquin): is that so?
(Emrys): thinking its 5 minutes
(Emrys): and then say…”quit wasting time!”
(Emrys): well maybe not you
(Emrys): maybe you’re one of those special ..risen above the sign thing people
(Emrys): which is cool



WHETHER SPACY OR NOT, YOU'LL HAVE TO TELL ME; AS FOR BECOMING INVOLVED AND LIVING FOR THE MOMENT... THAT WOULD DEFINITELY BE ME.

"Buona fortuna, signora Malèna"  

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When I discovered that this movie was written and directed by Guiseppe Tornatore (director of Cinema Paradiso one of my all time favourites) and that the task of subtitling was given to Anthony Minghella (writer/director The English Patient ... my ALL time favourite, simply brilliant) and to top it all of starred Monica Bellucci!!...

It was a must see.

Of course having someone who speaks italian present only served to enhance the experience as she set them straight when the translating was off... all in all, though it wasn't everything I expected it to be, I liked it mucho.


"Buona fortuna, signora Malèna"

IT'S A GOOD DAY TO BE ALIVE  

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(Hortencia): why is it a good day to be alive?

(Joaquin): everyday is

(Joaquin): I am living my dream

(Joaquin): learning what love means

(Joaquin): and striving towards a purpose

(Joaquin): having to let go of my wish list... but I know that the ones that matter

(Joaquin): those will happen

(Hortencia): well good for you

(Hortencia): ur on the up

(Hortencia): and what does love mean, by the by?

(Joaquin): love

(Joaquin): well it is the detachment of yourself

(Joaquin): and embracing something greater than what you could be on your own

(Joaquin): it is living for others

(Joaquin): and not being afraid to hurt

(Joaquin): to change

(Joaquin): to be more then you think you can be

(Joaquin): to let go

(Joaquin): and let love

(Joaquin): the Spirit of God

(Joaquin): move in you

(Joaquin): and take you somewhere you don't know

(Joaquin): know what I mean?

(Hortencia): yes

(Hortencia): I know what you mean

(Hortencia): and I hope it works out for you

(Joaquin ): it’s not exciting for everyone

(Joaquin ): obviously

(Joaquin): but

(Joaquin): it's what's for me

(Joaquin): so, I'm well

Reminiscence  

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I must have a soft side… came across some thoughts from times past…

“…Life has been very different without you around, and I don’t say that in a dreadful, fatalistic, overly romantic way, well… I can’t help feeling romantic about you, but you can’t blame me for that! Right… I was saying. It has been different, it’s like there are moments that are wonderful, moments that I have learned to appreciate in solitude, moments that I would have never even noticed  had I not been alone. They would have passed me by and I would have been completely unaware of the sublime beauty and intricate perfection that surrounded me… but the more I find myself discovering them, the more I realize that they will never be complete. I realize that as breathtaking, awe inspiring and emotive as they may be, they will never be complete without someone to share them with.

I guess all I can think about when I find myself in one of those moments is of how true happiness is incomplete when you have no one to share it with. Realizing that as wonderful as the moment may be, because you are aware of that completeness lacking made manifest in the absence of that special someone to share it with , the enchantment will simply never be good enough…and you being to experience a longing ,you hear that unspoken yet resonating call to attain that dream.  I know, I’m not making any sense…                
I think I understand me a little better…”

As much as I enjoy being alone…

All of you special people, wherever you may be… I know you’re out there, somewhere out there… and in time, sooner or later, I will find you!

Until then…

Let's breathe it all  in, think less of ourselves and reach out to someone today.  

a sugar cube for your thoughts  

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CHAT LOG:
*Sigifreda *: The Eres in my Cafe Tacvba, goddess of communications, kissu ga sugoku jozu na hito and cruel mistress who wont let me describe her as I wish.
Joaquin: that would be me

*Sigifreda *: cuz everyone is so intense about their little place in the world
Joaquin: do you take your coffee with sugar?
Joaquin: two cubes?
Joaquin: can I be the second cube…?
Joaquin: I want to the be the second sugar cube in the coffee of people's lives
Joaquin: I just made up that metaphor!
Joaquin: I am a genius!~
Joaquin: I really like that one…
*Sigifreda *: but some people don’t like sugar
*Sigifreda *: it’s not healthy
Joaquin: but it makes things sweeter…
Joaquin: sometimes too sweet
Joaquin: and if it's what it takes for them to appreciate the one cube…
Joaquin: realize they need no cube at all…
Joaquin: or quit the coffee
Joaquin: then that is what I want to be.
Joaquin: the second cube
Joaquin: sigh
*Sigifreda *: lol
*Sigifreda *: ur hilarious
*Sigifreda *: and what a lonely life
Joaquin: not at all
Joaquin: cause when people are in a rush
Joaquin: in a moment of absent mindedness, inertia, distraction or boredom
Joaquin: they may throw that second cube in there
Joaquin: only to get a reality check in the flavor
Joaquin: the only things is…
Joaquin: that second cube can become addicting
Joaquin: you think there is any danger of that?
*Sigifreda *: `plenty
*Sigifreda *: there are plenty people who are a sweet-tooth
*Sigifreda *: when it's not good for them
Joaquin: good thing I don’t drink coffee
*Sigifreda *: good thing I drink mine without sugar
Joaquin: creamer?... I wouldn’t mind being creamer
Joaquin: heh

Experimenting  

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I have decided to make my blog a guinea pig... it may not be very reader firendly for a couple of weeks...

heh...

You'll REALLY have to read beween the lines now!

Kudos

testing again  

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May they only get better...  

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I can still remember when you were just a little guy. Time flies when your're getting older. Don't worry, it only gets better. Enjoy!

May this year be the best yet... Feliz Cumpleaños!!!

Today  

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I found myself wanting to say something yet struggling with the words to express it.

You see, four days from now is the day that my dearest friend Emily will once again begin a new chapter in her life and as odd as it may sound,( I really don’t care what others think)I believe I share her excitement.

I wanted to say something adequate but in the end, after extensive pondering and too many hits on the backspace, I came to the conclusion that being as articulately expressive and brashly honest as she is (it’s one of the many things about her that make her so lovable), she's already said it all. There's nothing else to say.

So in her own words…


“Thank you for your love, thank you for your friendship, for being there for me, for supporting me in prayer - for everything. If our friendship ends here then I want you to know that I don't look at what we had as a waste of time or something I regret…

Nothing the heart gives away is lost; it is kept in the hearts of others. And you'll always have a special place in my heart…

I do wish you the best in love and life and if I never hear from you again... thank you, for everything…

I will always hold you in high esteem in my heart, for you have your own special place there.”



KOCHIRAKOSO



So here goes to those of you who have that feeling when you first wake up in the morning and stretch, that passion for life. The ones whose fantasies are somehow real and don’t settle for a dream, those that choose to allow those fantasies become a reality.

No one wants to have a half lived life.

Remember that, when things are not enough… I’ll be right here behind you.

May the good times begin!

Sigues en mi.

Happy Birthday Angel!  

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I love you little man!


8 years! !WOW!

I pray that this coming year will be one that you learn so many more new things. I know that you will teach us so much more. Thank you for still being here, for sticking it out and bringing to us your love and through it hope and faith into our lives.

There is something about you... with just looking at you, I realize that there is purpose... and it makes me refuse to give in.

You are giving the best of you, I will make you proud!

Good times  

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Had lunch a few weeks ago with these wonderful people. Barbacoa, tequila and lot's of Corona.

I am of the opinion that motherhood only enhances a woman's beauty, look at Joy.
Wow.

Thanks guys! Will be seeing more of you.